Let’s remember the rules

I think it’s time to review the rules of posting on the internet for some of our younger viewers. For those of you who didn’t live through the great Usenet Wars of the early 90’s, this should be very valuable information.

  1. Make sure to read each site’s Comment Policy.
  2. Be aware that many sites don’t accept HTML in comments, but do allow Textile Formatting. This is one of them. I should probably make a note of that somewhere on the page…
  3. Remember that posts that insult the owner of a site or anyone he cares about will probably just be deleted. Posts that insult while making a point will be carefully considered. Then deleted.
  4. Keep in mind that the owner of any given site spends far more time maintaining it than you do reading it, and will have far more time to figure out his response. Plus, if it doesn’t come out right, he can always go back and edit it. You can’t. So pick a fight with one of the other commenters: they’re equally defenseless.
  5. Comments posted anonymously are taken just as seriously as messages scribbled in pencil on a bathroom stall. Grow a pair and give your name. Hell, grow a big pair, and give your email address or URL. Otherwise, don’t be shocked when your name is listed as Anonymous Coward.
  6. Stay on topic. Either address the point or go post on SlashDot. No, really - we’ll all be waiting to hear what you say. That’s where we go when we want to waste time reading off-topic bullshit.
  7. Don’t put quotes around something if you aren’t quoting anything. People will look back to see what you were referencing, see that you just felt like throwing some quotes around, and think you’re a dumbass.
  8. Never forget that none of these rules apply in the least to the person maintaining the site. Is that unfair? Well, you get what you pay for.
  9. Don’t ever think you’re going to win a war of words with me. No, really. Ask around. I’ve been doing this longer than you, and I’ll win. But please keep trying: I need a good laugh. (Note: Except you, Dad.)

Oh, and if you’re some ditto-head conservative, save us all some trouble: you’re wrong. If you really want proof, send me an email about what you’d like to talk about and we can see about giving you a shot at a debate: my name at this URL will work.

September 7th, 2005 · Category: Site Stuff · Tags: , , , , , · Comments Off

Joe Clark: Thin-Skinned Crybaby, or Insensitive Cad? You decide

Joe Clark (previously mentioned) is having some trouble with fans of the Opera Web Browser. Normally when people are getting a web-style curb stomping, I like to post a little something in their defense.

And in Joe’s case, I have all the reason in the world to say a few words of support. He wrote the book on web accessibility. He’s funny, quirky, and uses the kind of cutesy language (”shurely”, “natch”) that is only bearable in very good writing. And his writing is very good.

But at the moment, I’m of the opinion that Joe’s a bit of an asshat.

Joe likes to sound smart. If given the choice between any two things, I get the feeling that he’d take the one with more syllables. And I certainly don’t have a problem with that. But it’s led him to his favorite word to throw at geeks: “Aspergerian.”

Not that he only likes to compare geeks to sufferers of a life-long tragic neurological condition that can destroy families. No, he tosses it around to describe a number of people.

(And let’s remember the way that insults work: you compare somebody to something you think is negative. For instance, when Jon Stewart says, “You’re such a Jew.” we know that it’s not an insult because he’s Jewish. When my coworker thinks somebody is being an asshole and says, “don’t be such a jew,” we know that a) he doesn’t like the way that person is behaving, and b) he doesn’t like jews. Pretty basic, right?)

Let’s take a look at some examples of how Joe uses the word:

On the other hand, I don’t have alpha geeks’ tics; asocial facial expressions, particularly the combo of downturned face, upturned eyes, and Aspergerian smirk; inappropriate whooping laughter [“Always reminds me of somebody machine-gunning a seal”]; and inability to dress other than for warmth. They get more done, but I’m better-rounded.
(Beavering)

So alpha geeks have an Aspergerian smirk? What does that mean? Seems like an insult in that context.

It just goes to show that Internet usage is so widespread even in dullsville Toronto that independent sects will pop up, even if they’re filled out with gormless Web-developer girls. (You can always tell by the bad hair, the glasses, and the quasi-Aspergerian look in the eyes.)
(September 2003 ‘Volt’ Show Reviews)

That’s definitely an insult, right? No question there.

…computer experts are rarely worth looking at for more then five seconds at a time; we are quasi-Aspergerian and have poor fashion sense, with unusual exceptions.
(You can use captioning or you can use Heath)

Inconclusive - but definitely negative. Note that just because he includes himself (as a computer expert) it doesn’t mean that he’s not using it as insult. (”I was such a retard today!”)

Possibly a fair point, though admittedly rather minor, but I’ve
found that critics of my book have quasi-Aspergerian capacities to
expand inconsequential issues into blanket condemnations. It’s a
feature I recognize in myself, of course.
(Re: Joe Clark book review from pcpro)

Qualified by the quasi-, but still an insult.

However: If, every time I dare to question Operatic orthodoxy, I get a fusillade of name-calling and character defamation from borderline Aspergerians who wouldn’t know a salad fork from a browser tab, then I’m just not gonna talk about Opera.
(How very hard indeed it is to defend Opera)

Some of these other uses might be an attempt to use the clinical definition to provide a (mean but) fair comparison, but this is just Joe venting. There’s no call for tossing Asperger’s into that paragraph.

There are enough borderline Aspergerians and autistics shuffling through the halls in Austin avoiding eye contact with other carbon-based lifeforms…
(fuck the SXSW etiquette guide)

Well, at least we’ve got equal time for autism sufferers as well!

I would be too Aspergerian to wear a ring – I’d sit there and worry it all day – but it symbolizes what I did not do.
(Engineers)

I’m thinking he might have been meaning to pick on OCD victims here and just typed “Aspergerian” out of habit.

Starting to see why Matt Welch told Joe, “you sound about as fun as eye surgery“? I know I am!

At this point, I’m sure that you’re all saying, “Jemal - isn’t this the sort of thing you should bring up to somebody privately before you just insult them online?” Which, of course, I did. Joe denies that he’s insulting Aspergerians when he compares other people to them. I don’t buy it.

Seeing terms like this getting tossed around as insults bothers me. Of course, part of the reason is that I have a son who I wish had Asperger’s instead of autism. But I don’t like when kids use “gay” to mean “stupid” and I don’t have any reason to think that Jared is gay. I don’t like when people use “kike” to mean “cheap” and my wife isn’t Jewish. And I greatly prefer “Let’s get it started” to “Let’s get retarded” and nobody in my house is retarded.

But then, Joe always admits when he’s wrong, right?

Let’s finish with one last quote from Joe:

You are deliberately hurting me, people, and you’re doing all this over software that can be repaired, unlike my feelings.

(Opera fanboys, fuck off)

Good thing that nobody but Joe has feelings - least of all Aspergerians.

August 10th, 2005 · Category: Autism, Family, Free Speech · Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , · Comments Off