So while things have been pretty shitty for me, I realized that I’m making things shitty for the rest of you by not sharing what’s going on with Jared. Here’s a small update, as we slowly creep back to a more normal posting schedule:
Jared decided back in December that he wanted to go see the Bee Movie, and he was really determined to go, so I took him. And surprise of surprises, he was really good! So I also took him to Alvin and the Chipmunks and the Water Horse. Then a few weeks ago, he announced that he wanted to go to see Veggie Tales: The Pirates that Don’t Do Anything, and I had a bad feeling. I thought I remembered that their shows were of a religious nature, and, as you all know, I’m concerned about bringing too many abstractions into Jared’s life. But the commercials didn’t seem religious, so we went.
Luckily, it wasn’t religious. There were some undercurrents, but not very different than the typical “do the right thing” message of most children’s programming. When we went shopping for Jared’s birthday, he stood and stared at a trio of Veggie Tales movies, and really seemed to want them. Now, with the situation being the way it is, I had to take Jared and Sierra out with me, and then dodge and weave around to get his presents while he was looking the other way, and I didn’t have a chance to really check out these movies. Big mistake.
One is about temptation. Okay, fine. One is about The Wizard of Oz (on the surface). And the last is a pretty straight-forward retelling of Exodus with vegetables. Fine. But Jared’s favorite part of any DVD is the bonus material, and Jared found all of the easter eggs on his own pretty quickly. He watched all the behind the scenes shorts, and sat through all the previews.
So I was a little tweaked, but not exactly surprised when this exchange came up:
Jared: I can’t get bologna on my own.
Me: Sure you can, Jared. It’s not the world’s healthiest snack, but it’s a lot better than some of the junk out there. You’re allowed to have some bologna, just not too much.
Jared: No. I can only do it with God.
Sigh. I tried to convince him that the message the show was giving him wasn’t about getting snacks, but I didn’t make a lot of headway. And this was the sort of thing I was concerned with: Jared getting messages about religion that he really can’t understand at this point in his life. I mean, Jared is a reading whiz and a math genius, but metaphor and allegory are pretty much beyond him.
Or so I thought.
Tonight I read Jared one of my favorite children’s books. Usually he reads to me at bedtime as part of his homework, but on long weekends, I love getting a chance to read to him. It’s a whole production: voices, hand gestures, lunging around the bed for dramatic effect. I’m sure you can imagine. So I get done reading Where the Wild Things Are, and Jared looks at me and says, “Oh, it’s a prodigal son story.”
Don’t I feel silly.