October 2nd, 2007 by Jemaleddin Cole

A lot of my traffic on this site is from search engines. And while I like to think that my site is a beacon of knowledge in the wasteland of the Internet, I get the feeling that not everyone is finding what they were looking for.

Google’s Webmaster Tools lets you see what search terms led people to your site, as well as what your average search ranking is for those terms. Here’s what I have for the last week:

Top search queries	Average top position
suck me	9
gmail notifier firefox	8
heiffer project	2
auto zoom	4
“fat js”	2
gahan	6
bettered	8
greasemonkey scripts	14
ufc 75 wikipedia	7
jemal	9
drew carey marine	10
ufc 75 predictions	4
all my shirts	6
how can i get back to my desktop	6
pico pica	6
all my shirt	10
not kosher	10
skagen 396ltmb	5
first night	8
all star batman and robin the boy wonder 7 torrent	9

Some of those people got what they were looking for. But whoever searched for “suck me” probably didn’t want an article about comic books. And while I did write about Batman, I don’t host any torrents to download that issue.

So, I’d like to apologize to free-loaders and porn-seekers: I’m sorry Google sent you here, but you’re going to have to look elsewhere.

4 Responses to “Not exactly what you were looking for”

1. Mine have been very tame as of late. my top ones, in order have been:

   http://www.vandyll.net
   arthur de pins (boy, didn’t expect that one to be that popular)
   becky o’donahue
   sexy illustrations
   spoke toolbar

   Not as exciting as previous months, but the holidays are coming up. =)

   — jerry October 2nd, 2007 at 2:20 pm #

2. Oh, wait. I looked a couple more down the list. Coming in at the #9 spot:

   “suck and the whore”

   Yeah….. and it was more than one person that searched it…. O.o

   — jerry October 2nd, 2007 at 2:43 pm #

3. Nice! But don’t you feel bad for those people?

   I just looked up my last year’s search referral terms:

   apple+keyboard
   8th grade math
   rednecks
   autism speaks
   suck me
   pico pica
   auto zoom
   Apple+Keyboard
   zombie virus
   autism speaks video
   imac
   lindsay lohan personal assistant
   craziest thing on the internet

   I’m just saying: this Internet place is full of crazy people.

   — Jemaleddin October 2nd, 2007 at 3:20 pm #

4. From last year, my biggest was:

   “white trash”

   Yeah, I know. Who’d have thunk it? =P

   — jerry October 2nd, 2007 at 8:09 pm #