September 7th, 2005 by Jemaleddin Cole

I think it’s time to review the rules of posting on the internet for some of our younger viewers. For those of you who didn’t live through the great Usenet Wars of the early 90’s, this should be very valuable information.

1. Make sure to read each site’s Comment Policy.
2. Be aware that many sites don’t accept HTML in comments, but do allow Textile Formatting. This is one of them. I should probably make a note of that somewhere on the page…
3. Remember that posts that insult the owner of a site or anyone he cares about will probably just be deleted. Posts that insult while making a point will be carefully considered. Then deleted.
4. Keep in mind that the owner of any given site spends far more time maintaining it than you do reading it, and will have far more time to figure out his response. Plus, if it doesn’t come out right, he can always go back and edit it. You can’t. So pick a fight with one of the other commenters: they’re equally defenseless.
5. Comments posted anonymously are taken just as seriously as messages scribbled in pencil on a bathroom stall. Grow a pair and give your name. Hell, grow a big pair, and give your email address or URL. Otherwise, don’t be shocked when your name is listed as Anonymous Coward.
6. Stay on topic. Either address the point or go post on SlashDot. No, really - we’ll all be waiting to hear what you say. That’s where we go when we want to waste time reading off-topic bullshit.
7. Don’t put quotes around something if you aren’t quoting anything. People will look back to see what you were referencing, see that you just felt like throwing some quotes around, and think you’re a dumbass.
8. Never forget that none of these rules apply in the least to the person maintaining the site. Is that unfair? Well, you get what you pay for.
9. Don’t ever think you’re going to win a war of words with me. No, really. Ask around. I’ve been doing this longer than you, and I’ll win. But please keep trying: I need a good laugh. (Note: Except you, Dad.)

Oh, and if you’re some ditto-head conservative, save us all some trouble: you’re wrong. If you really want proof, send me an email about what you’d like to talk about and we can see about giving you a shot at a debate: my name at this URL will work.

Comments are closed. me by email.